David Beckam in an unusually expansive and hopelessly hopeful mood

"I can fully understand that a new manager should want to make his mark on the team and build towards the next World Cup, I'm proud have played for England for 10 years and my passion for representing my country remains as strong as ever. I hope they lose every fucking game from now on. To think I quit in the hope that it would be enough punishment for the pathetic show we put on in Germany. Maybe it's time I contacted Sourav Ganguly. After all, he's been making polite noises about football. Perhaps he could teach me to make a few polite noises about cricket. Or maybe I should contact Duncan Fletcher. What with Andrew Strauss sounding so enthusiastic about fashion, the ECB might consider giving me a job."